I am a little clumsy, so I spend a significant amount of time pancaked on the law school’s stairs, frantically picking up my books.

Usually no one catches the shit show,  but Jill entered the stairwell right after I fell, coffee cup in hand…

Jill: “OH MY GOD ARE YOU OKAY?”
Me (getting up): “Oh, I am on a mission to douse every stairwell in the law school with coffee…”
Jill: “What?”
Me: “Nothing. Just clumsy I guess! I should buy a pair of knee pads…”
Jill (scoffing): “Looks like you’d be better off investing in a helmet.”

See also: The Best of Jill.